MNLWYPBP chapter 38: White, clouded in darkness. Black, brightly shining

He was born to be loved.

He learnt how to be loved and learnt how to love someone back…

….which was why he never knew what ‘hatred’ was…

He never knew it existed before…

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A pair of blue eyes glanced sideways.

“Memory change…[complete]…”

“Hm…”, the room’s owner moaned slightly, he was sleeping on the bed. Excalibur took her eyes off the descendant of Bedivere and Merlin before bending herself down to look at him.

“We don’t understand…Haref”, she looked at him, “even though, it pains you to do this, why are you doing it.”

He merely smiled…he did not say anything.

She did not understand but her mind wandered to the events prior to this. The time when the descendant of Bedivere was sleeping. When Haref Lancelot told her to look into that child’s memories…

A soul from a different world.

When she told her master this. he merely made a face of enlightenment, “…so that’s why this guy’s got a screw loose.”

She looked even deeper. There aren’t that many memories and there were only a handful of people in it but only one person dominated and swallowed up most of his memories.

A girl, who is called ‘younger sister’ by this soul.

“…An important person, is that so?”, Haref mumbled, “Can he die for her…no that’s a bit too excessive. Will she appear in your mechanism…” ( TN: remember that one mechanism that shows the person you love the most from the earlier chapters )

“He can die for her…if it’s for this girl, the descendant of Bedivere can die for her”, Guinevere said while Haref flinched. “He would even exchange his life for her’s…because to the descendant of Bedivere, this girl is too important to him…”

“Is that so…hm”, Haref closed his eyes, “…erase it...”

…and his mouth curved into a vicious smile.

“Change his memories Excalibur.”

 

She looked at him and saw darkness within his rainbow coloured eyes.

“…erase…his important person…”

She is his sword.

Although she wanted to know the reason but if he desire her to do so, she will do it. If she had the strength or ability, as long as he said it, she will give it to him…

The entire process finished quickly. His memories will fade away slowly, not even the person will know what is happening.

“…His important person…”, Haref’s mumble called her back to reality. “In the beginning, he probably would be hurt because he’s confused but after a while, even the feelings he had for this person will fade away… If he really is a soul from a different world then this world shouldn’t have any stimulus which will make him remember her or prompt him to try to remember her…since it will merely feel like a forgotten memory that’s not important to him…”

“To us, that is only your perspective.”, she disagreed, “There are many components to feelings you have towards a person. It’s not like if the memories were to fade away, your feelings towards that person would also fade away. Yes, some of his feelings will fade away but to us…

…the feelings of longing for that person will never fade away…”

In fact, it will multiply and replace the other feelings that have faded away.

 

“Don’t ever underestimate a person’s feelings.”

 

Haref was still smiling, “I also think so, Excalibur.”.

She…did not understand him anymore.

“A seat for his important person is empty…his desires will only multiply. His longing will become more violent as time goes on. His desire of wanting to fulfil that empty seat…”, Haref laughed and hummed.

 

“Hey…what would happen if I took that seat?”

 

“Be his important person, make him love me, make him be able to die for me, cry for me…miss me…unable to ‘betray’ me”, the light in his rainbow-coloured eyes dimmed. “…If that were to happen, how great would it be…”

After a moment, Haref Lancelot laughed.

She looked at him like she understood…but didn’t at the same time.

He would go this far just because of a lie? Just because his pride was trampled on? Or is it merely because of his disappointment and grief?

To his first friend…he stole ‘acceptance’.

To another…he stole his ‘important person’.

Even though, he may be laughing and smiling but she desperately wanted to ask him…

In the end,

Is there anyone left in this world that you would be able tell them to trust each other,

my master…

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.

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“We don’t understand…Haref”

“Even though, it pains you to do this, why are you doing it.”

He thought of the Holy Sword’s words in silence.

Maybe the reason why he’s doing this because he’s feeling petty towards one person.

“The reason was because they lied to me.”

…it probably sounds unreasonable to many people.

He knew that the reason why he could grow faster and learn faster than others because of his talent that came with the power of light. He was born with the blessings of angels. He was born to be loved. He was born with fortune. Everyone ‘thought’ he was grown up…he’s an adult…

Even if his body may be small…

He must be like an ‘elder brother’ to those in the Round Table. Be someone others can rely on because he’s the most powerful, the most qualified.

It wasn’t hard for him…not at all.

He couldn’t remember when the last time he cried was…no, that isn’t right, it seems like he never cried. He’s strong enough, strong enough to receive praise from his father. He was never told off or was told that he was lacking in something. He is the most ideal person…

So, please just ‘tell’ me…the truth of that day.

None of you have to be afraid of the Prince who wields the power of darkness because I can help all of you. I’m strong, I’m intelligent, I have talent and there’s isn’t a thing I can’t do.

Although, he may be stronger than me right now…but that doesn’t mean I can’t do anything to him…

If he threatens you guys, I can get rid of him.

If he harms any of you, I will kill him.

So, please, ‘trust’ me and I will protect all of you with everything I have…

…Nigel…Gilbert…

“Haref, something happened…Prince Salsaal…”

I will return your trust in me…

“…It’s the mechanism of this place that’s making us see Prince Salsaal.”

“Aren’t you overthinking it Haref? How could the Prince come out, he’s being imprisoned right now!”

“Haref you’re probably just overthinking it.”

…which has never existed…

The hope of his friends telling him the truth was destroyed within the blink of an eye.

Haref Lancelot has never cried.

But that…was the first time he could feel tears trickling down his face.

 

 

Once…he was born to be loved.

He was born to be loved and to love someone back.

He was born to be a ‘special’ existence, an existence that is covered with sparkling light and brightly lit colours just like his eyes.

However, when darkness came…

…black mixed with white…stole something from him and left something for him…

…Hatred, Disgust, Embarrassment and Envy.

White that is no longer white…while Black is becoming white

…Becoming his…’was’ his.

In this world, Gods cannot grant you your wish. You can only achieve them with your own two hands. He wanted to meet the Holy Sword no matter what, just because he wanted power and when the Sword answered him, he swore to himself…

…he will ‘hunt’ all of them back.

‘Take’ everything that was his and return everything they’ve given to him back to them.

“They will pay.”

Black swallowed up his heart slowly…he knew, but did not stop it.

The gaze which his father gave him became darker and darker but he never tried to stop him.

He laughed…laughed and laughed…

He abandoned that whisper within his heart…

 

“Hey, I’ve become stronger so, this time…please

…please don’t betray me again.”

 

On that day, a boy…

…became broken…before anyone could notice.

 

Next chapter

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Author’s note:

 

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[Tea time behind the curtains -when guys fight it doesn’t always end with a punch-]

Gilbert: “Even if you may calm down after you punch me, please don’t…”

Nigel: “Haref’s got a lot of strength…like a lot.”

Haref: “…”

Gilbert: “But if Salsaal can calm down after punching me then please feel free!”

Salsaal: “Why? Do you like me?”

Nigel: “Oh, it’s because you’re weak…I meant delicate.”

Salsaal: “Go to hell!”

 

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Translator’s note:

This chapter breaks my heart.